The body has a way of remembering
the habits that we create.
Some call it muscle memory,
While others say they are instinctual,
Like the way I hold her hand:
With mine covering her thumb and index finger
Because my hand is so much larger.
We can’t hold them any other way,
It doesn’t feel right otherwise.
One day, I drove the streets I knew
Remembering the charred house
That has been replaced.
I can still feel the dresser, the carpet,
And the heat on my back
As I searched the way since I was taught:
Crawl, Reach, Sweep. Crawl, Reach, Sweep.
Habits are created because they’re obvious
And they are easy.
The dishes are easier to place in the sink
Rather than wash them right away
And laundry is best left in the basket
Because who actually has time to fold it?
Flaws are simple to infuse into my thoughts
because they stare me in the face
Who wants to have a scavenger hunt
For the things they like about themselves?
Habits are a thought process
Built over time, cues and triggers
A call for help, is a call for help,
No matter where you are.
Which is why “off duty” does not exist
And work does not stay at the office.
The back of a plane simply
becomes a much smaller ambulance
The whining engines now sirens
Descending upon our destination
This does not mean that you cannot change
But that it needs to become more obvious.
Gradual steps create new patterns
on a journey to a reward:
Acceptance, that overflowing dishes are okay
Laundry will be folded in time
That you are okay the way you are
And you will become who you need to be
Tim is a Healing Artist, social worker and volunteer Firefighter/EMT. As an Introvert trained to appear extroverted, he creates to share in the human experience with you and is always interested in hearing your story.
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